ceesquatch:

this is actually what texas sounds like

hammpix:

For those of you who don’t understand archaeology, I have made a diagram.

starrynights-:

shouldertappingghosts:

If I was a famous author I would publish a book with ten different endings which all went to print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then when they figured it out I would ‘come clean’, telling them that I had released eleven alternate endings and watch them panic again as they all try to find the last ending.

are you satan

sexhappinesslove:

supamuthafuckinvillain:

I jus threw up in my mouth

This worries me…if they shut down all the porn blogs, I can pretty much guarantee I won’t be opening a “normal” blog…

selfdoubtandsyphilis:

dankestrnemes:

do animals think in english or in the sounds they make

this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for

scvlptures:

depression is when you don’t really care about anything

anxiety is when you care too much about everything

and having both is just like what

DBS

Vɪᴀ : Rᴜᴘᴇʀᴛ-EOR

teenytigress:

SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY